Audio Drama Debut - Transcript - S01E08
All of the words I said out loud for S01E08 of Audio Drama Debut, my podcast showcasing new audio drama, fiction and RPG trailers.
SFX - Fountain pen writing, and then being capped.
Hello there. Please, come in. Don't worry, we've got the office set up properly now. The visitors chair is the correct distance from everything it needs to be distant from, and we don't need that pesky isolation bubble any more.
Unfortunately, I can only offer you dry crackers today. I tried to do a big shop with the computer thingy, and apparently everybody else has had the same idea. Selfish devils. How on earth am I meant to acquire the avocados and prosecco for my big party now?
No, no, don't interrupt. Even if you were to ask very nicely, I really can't have any more guests. When we have more than 50 people, fire regulations kick in, and you would not believe how flammable a library is.
What library? Well the library you're sat in, of course. The Library of Audio Fiction. This great, burnable collection of dramas, books, stories, actual plays and a few other things made of delicate material.
I suppose since you're not allowed to come to my party, I should give you something else to do. Let's see, you've got me thinking about fire now, so what about a few hell-themed audio dramas?
There's this one, about a band of demons, trying to start a band, while still getting up to rather petty evil in a shopping centre. Or this one, about a big shop set on top of a portal to hell, ala Sunnydale, and all the chaos that causes. Or perhaps one of my personal favourites, about a kindly professor sent to hell, merely because of his flagrant atheism? Long running and excellent.
Ah, I see. The restrictions on staying indoors are giving you a mad desire for novelty, are they? You'll be wanting some more new shows then I suppose. Luckily, delivery of those isn't often disrupted. All I need to do is wave the magic headphones over this dish, and mutter some magic words, (*indistinct mumbling*), and
SFX - The out-rushing of air, as space previously filled with nothing is somehow filled with cassette tapes
we have some trailers for you to listen to. Some recent releases, and some things not quite out yet.
Let's see, first up it's Red Valley, about Hypersleep.
[CLIP - Red Valley]
Then there's this week's RPG, Pearlfire, which is about a cataclysmic event that unleashes magic and monsters of legend overnight on a world unprepared. Join Althea, Tawny, and Xavier as they track down and unravel arcane mysteries seeking the peace they once knew, harnessing the new magics and becoming monster hunters in the process. An actual-play podcast featuring their own storytelling RPG sprinkled with some dice-roll chaos!
[CLIP - Pearlfire]
Then the first show from the future, We Be Pirates, which reads: From the ground our lands look like clouds, but there's so much more than just clouds up here. When we land at Port, there be mountains, there be valleys, there be streams and lakes. Every cloud has it's own land and every land has it's own people and those lands be ruled by Kings and Queens...all but one. The only land ruled by a code...Port Barsole.
[CLIP - We Be Pirates]
And finally, also from the future, Light Hearts. Running a business is hard. Running a business alone in an old, haunted building is even harder. Janine didn’t know what she was getting herself into when she opened Prism - but with the help of Ryan (an astronomy professor with a useful knack) and Kale (an artist with a mind for marketing), she manages to stay aloft. Light Hearts follows the daily shenanigans of serving Prism’s customers, solving strange problems, and wrangling the occasional unexpected patron.
[CLIP - Light Hearts]
Right, that's your lot for this week. Hope you enjoyed those, and feel free to give them to your friends. In fact, tell everybody you know to get together and tell us about any new shows we don't already have. They're all going to want to get together on twitter and shout @AudioDramaDebut.